By Princess Pat Akpabio
For so many decades since the existence of mankind, the dignity of a woman has always been accredited to her husband or marital status in the society and of course how she carried and presented herself in the society as well. On this article, I want to address the DIGNITY OF WOMANHOOD.
I'll like to lay down basic definitions of the words involved for a clearer understanding. What is dignity? dignity is defined according to Oxford dictionaries as self-respect, self-regard, self-worth.
The quality of being worthy of esteem or respect. What is Womanhood? Womanhood, as defined by Miriam Webster dictionary, is the state or condition of being an adult woman and no longer a girl.
The dignity of women as defined by Princess Pat Akpabio is the self-respect, self-regard, and self-worth of being a woman.
It is imperative to know that It is impossible to regain, reclaim and maintain the Dignity of womanhood with a woman who is no longer a girl without having self-respect, self-regard, and self-worth of being a woman.
I mean if you don't have regards for yourself as a woman by constantly telling yourself that you are good enough to have the best in life, marry the best man, live in a comfortable home built by yourself through hard work, it is impossible for a man to have regards for you, to find you worthy of his love.
We have a lot of emotionally stranded women today in Africa because they fail to dignify themselves as women of proven integrity by making use of their educational qualifications and exposure.
For instance, a woman went to the university and graduated top of the class and eventually gets married to a not so intelligent man who is so intimidated with her educational excellence, what do u think that an insecure not so intelligent man will do to such a woman? He will abuse her especially if he is fortunate to get into money and the woman agreed to be the housewife which nothing is wrong with that but the Bible says in 2 Corinthians 6:14 "Do not become unequally yoked together with unbelievers.
For what partnership have righteousness and lawlessness? Or what fellowship has the light with darkness?" It is not just spiritually but also physically in terms of educational background and exposure. A man who doesn't value education will definitely abuse your intelligence in order to subdue you to his standards of understanding life and doing things.
He will use all manner of tactics to find fault in everything you do that doesn't go his way. Being yoked together with a man with lesser qualifications is like night and day which will not work because of the Dissimilarities between backgrounds. PROBLEMS TO WOMANHOOD What type of Problems are women aka "girl child" facing in our society today that serves as an impediment to womanhood?
- Cases of Inequality aka No opportunity to serve in high political offices based on gender and age discrimination in African countries and core Western countries. You would usually hear ”don't give a woman power she will abuse the husband and sit on his head and I keep asking so the man won't do the same thing to the woman?” usually no response to this question when referred back to the man. ”You would hear she has no or will have no respect for men and I am asking and the man lies because he is a man he gets away with a lot of things?”
- The girl child education is not enforced in most cases like the male child but rather girl child prostitution is encouraged where they've nicked named it ”runs.” A man will sleep with a young woman and pay millions, in some cases little or nothing in the guise of giving her a job that never comes to reality. So, the girl child/woman is constantly being taken advantage of daily because of their level of education and low self-esteem as being seen as sex objects.
- Not properly informed on the job opportunities available to both male and female. Some jobs are seen only to be meant for the man not the woman like arm forces and para-military organizations, the majority of women are the only ones doing marketing in the banks. The number of Men should increase and also be sent on these marketing jobs, so the stereotypes of what women do out on marketing will also shift to men for what is good for the goose is good for the gander
- Infidelity: they say it is a man’s world, all men are cheats and a man can have as many women as he can afford without a query. Well, I say it this way ”a man will only treat you the way you allow him to treat you not the way you deserve to be treated.”-PPA Some women because of lack of self-love, don't even know how a man, a good man should treat her and so she settles for a cheat compromising her happiness. Problem Solutions to the Dignity of Womanhood .
- Increase the education of the girl child: Women/Girl child education must be encouraged by both mothers and fathers, Community leaders as a whole; a Matter of fact everyone should support the education of the girl child as much as the boy child. We need to stop saying tomorrow she will be married out to a man, so why waste your resources on a girl child who will take all her achievements to her husband’s home? Let us prepare the girl child to be a working-class mother and an Amazon. ”The stronger and educated our women are in our communities, the more stable the home front and more enlighten our communities.”~PPA .
- Equality in Employment: that is employment and promotion should be based on qualification and merit not sexually motivated or influenced.
- Orientation Change: Sensitization of the mindsets of the people especially in the rural areas. People should be made to know that there is an opportunity in the arm forces and para-military organization and that it is not only Meant for men largely but women as well
- Empowerment of Women through Political Appointments based on qualification, vocational training and skills acquisition, agricultural loans to help in farming, creating enabling environment to encourage women to vie for political offices by putting the necessary laws to protect women like in the western world where hilarity Clinton a former First Lady vied for the office of the president of the nation. We have less 35% of women holding political offices but we look forward to seeing more women in the top-ranking offices. We understand that it is a gradual process and it will steadily progress until we get to 50/50. The Wisdom of Solomon has nothing to do with Metuzala where age is everything. If you are not up to 60 years you will not be given a political appointment. Question is how healthy is the person being appointed? The Bible says our years are 70 or 80 if we've special mightiness our existence is in trouble and filled with hurtfulness psalms 90:10. Gowan at the age of 34 was already a president, Buhari at 27 was a minister of petroleum. There is a saying that goes like this "the youths of today will be the leaders of tomorrow" how can the effectively lead when the environment is not enabling to achieve the necessary leadership skills as a woman? It is time that we empower our young women and young men to take over leadership by giving them the necessary support, encouragement, enabling environment, and exposure to governance.
How do we restore the dignity of womanhood?
Say no to sexual abuses in women Say no to domestic violence and abuse against a woman
Say no to the belittling of the girl child in the midst of the boy child
Encourage the girl child to be financially independent so that when they love they love for love
Encourage the girl child to aspire for high ranking offices in all works of life by Saying no to discrimination against women.
Discrimination here is defined as "any distinction, exclusion or restriction made on the basis of sex which has the effect or purpose of impairing or nullifying the recognition, enjoyment or exercise by women, irrespective of their marital status, on a basis of equality of men and women, of human rights and fundamental freedoms in the political, economic, social, cultural, civil or any other field."
I am Princess Pat Akpabio and this is Changing minds changing attitudes.