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Topic: Dating: Beyond Expectations And Imaginations

Princess Pat Akpabio

We live in a world where we hear and use the word Dating. In my own definition, dating is simply seeing someone of the opposite sex that you which to foster an intimate relationship with should the environment of the engagement is conducive.

Dating a man or a woman, is all about what you imagine to come out of it, what you expect to come out of it and what actually comes out of it. Whatever the outcome, dating is a learning curve.

In a relationship, dating goes beyond Expectations and imaginations. It is matter of the hearts, where two people's hearts are involved. You don’t know a good kernel until you break it from the shell. Wouldn’t you agree with me? Until you go into that relationship, you will never know the outcome.

Dating is risk taking. You are putting your feelings on the line, you are opening up your vulnerability to someone else who isn't your mother or father. It could be risky. You could get heart broken but you could also get loved. So it is 100%/100%.

7 Food For Thoughts While Dating?

  1. Be open minded. That is an adventure with your emotions. Haven’t you noticed that some people go into relationships having a preconceived expectation only to be disappointed that it was only an imagination, a flash in the pan. Be aware that, When your expectation in a given relationship becomes an imagination, that is your cue, that it wasn’t meant to be. When your expectation in a dating relationship doesn’t become your actualisation of a love union in paradise, move on. If you have an open when going into that relationship, it will be easy for you to move on no matter the negative outcome
  2. always operate within the bubbles. In dating, operate within the bubbles but keep a window for safe landing. Guide your emotions just in case it doesn’t work out. Have the mind set if it works, it works. do everything to make sure it works while operating within the bubbles. If you look outside the bubbles, pressure will come, distractions, gossips, hear say, obstacle they say is what you will see when your eyes are off the goal. You begin to Live in an elusion. Your expectations becomes your imagination which can never come to actualisation of love in paradise, if you look out of the bubbles
  3. Don’t put yourself in a box when dating. Always think outside the box in an original way. Being yourself at every given times very important. realise that dating doesn’t mean that it will end up in marriage, it could end up in other good attributes like a business partnership, offering a helping hand, meeting a need, expanding of relationship- even if you are to marry someone else, you can remember someone you dated and recommend them for the job, if it is within their scope of expertise. Well you may think that this is self fish but I think that it is being self full Never Compromise your self happiness in order to keep a relationship that is not working. Dating is not a one way traffic that will always end up in marriage
  4. Depend on God. While being optimistic that the relationship will workout and turn out to be an actual lasting union you will have to depend on God. If things don’t work out the way you expected, don’t be depressed about it just be stoic about everything. Keep living and keep keeping on. A lot of people worry about moving on, what people will say especially if it was such a known relationship, which could lead to raise blood pressure that you really don’t need.
  5. Be Wise: When someone that you have been in a relationship with leaves you and married someone else and then comes back to you professing love, that is a lie. You weren’t good enough to be married to him or her so you will never be good enough after wards. There maybe something he or she is looking for to gain from you. He or she has ulterior motives, which you can only descend with wisdom. It could be that you are in a place of advantage and he or she is trying to tap into it. It could be that they are emotionally starved and so they are looking for a gap stander to fill the vacuum. Don’t be a victim twice.
  6. Don’t Settle for less in any relationship: when you know you can have the best, Don’t be in a hurry to settle because of age or peer pressure, oh, all my friends are getting married or are married. who told that they are happy? Why do you compare yourself To them. Be you. Be contented with yourself and learn self love. One day your love will come.
  7. Self love: When you feel disappointed, you could want to commit suicide, be depressed, think of revenge, seek babalawo, witch doctor for love portion to get the man or woman to love them that always has a negative effect. All of these are not necessary. Learn to love yourself regardless of what you are going through emtionally. Learn to love yourself enough. Be in love with you. I mean nobody can love you more than you can love yourself. You are your own best friend and best lover.

CLOSING THOUGHTS
After all, is said and done, remember you owe yourself a right to happiness. Dating is beyond expectations and imaginations, it is a reality show of as you make your bed, so you lie on it. If it doesn’t work out that way, move on to someone better because there is someone better out there waiting for you.

When you are repeatedly hurt in a dating relationship, Remember two options are always available: It’s either you forgive and stay, or you forgive and WALK. While advising that you should follow your heart, please allow God to be part of the decision you make.
Don’t turn to mediums to win back lost love, it always backfires in the long run. Ain'tnobody can love you the way you can love yourself. Befriend you and tell you you deserve to love and be loved.

Know that you will be held accountable by God for all you do here on earth when the time comes. Dating: is beyond your expectations and imaginations and that is changing minds changing attitudes.

I am Princess Pat Akpabio

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